Once The Dust Has Settled
by SwEydie
Summary: Can Jesse and Rachel find their way back to each other, once the dust of the first season has settled?  Follow St. Berry in a quest toward redemption.  A series of interconnected one-shots, set after Journey.
1. Somewhere Feeling Lonely

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, I would totally have lots more Jesse in it.**

* * *

-1 **Are You ****Somewhere Feeling Lonely?**

He looked up to see that the mirror was foggy from the hot shower he had just taken. After drying his face with the hand towel, he wiped the mirror in order to make it clear, all the time avoiding looking into it. Afraid of what he'd see there.

Walking into his room, Jesse felt a sudden sense of relief. He was finally alone after being bombarded with the many congratulatory hugs and smiles. Now he felt completely exhausted.

Lying in his bed, he remembered the day's events. Singing during Regionals had been exhilarating. Having a year's hard work pay off never felt better…or worse.

Closing his eyes, he could see her face, crumpled and fallen. He remembered her trying to avert her eyes from his. Jesse felt a dull ache in his stomach that was becoming all too familiar nowadays. He tried to erase how her whole being seemed to deflate when the winning team was announced.

Instead, he switched to the memory of his parents' proud expressions today. He wondered if they would still feel as proud if they knew what he had done in order to attain that trophy.

His throat suddenly became dry.

Walking down the stairs, he could see the "Congrats" banner that had been put up on the wall on his return from the competition. Upon entering the kitchen, he headed straight to the fridge. He brought out the pitcher of iced tea, and after pouring himself a glass, he turned to place the pitcher back inside. He was about to close the door, when he caught a glimpse of something that made his stomach turn.

Reaching inside the fridge, he brought out an egg and stared at it. Testing its weight in his hand, Jesse saw Rachel's crushed face once again in his mind. Only this time, she was standing in a parking lot.

_"Do it. Break it like you broke my heart." _

The words rang in his head. Closing his eyes, he let himself repeat the words that were spoken only once before.

"I loved you," he confessed out loud, to no one but himself.

After smashing the egg inside the sink, he dipped his head to release the contents of his stomach. The same way he did that day.

* * *

_I love you_

The same words, only these were in a different tense.

_I love you_, she read the text again.

_Goodnight_, she texted back.

It wasn't the first time she'd heard those three words, or in this case, read them. But each time she couldn't help feeling a bit disappointed they were coming from someone else.

Rachel knew that she shouldn't think about Jesse anymore. She was with Finn now, and was determined to make it right with him. After all, he had been right about Jesse all along. At least, that's what she kept telling herself as she kissed him on the stairs, hoping he could help her forget what could have been with Jesse.

But every time she heard those three words from Finn, she couldn't help the sting that brought on the same three words, in a different tense. It hurt to know that _I loved you _had an entirely different meaning altogether.

Rachel turned off her lamp, as she made her way to bed. Once in bed, she closed her eyes and welcomed the image of Jesse singing during the competition. She had hoped New Directions was strong enough to beat Vocal Adrenaline. Had dreamt of seeing Jesse's face as she walked away with his trophy as he had walked away with her heart. She had hoped she could coax Shelby into coming to coach New Directions. But all her hopes seemed to be crashing down on her lately. The same way dozens of eggs had crashed down on her that day.

Replaying Jesse's image in her head, she realized she was wrong to tell Shelby he didn't have heart. He did, and it showed during his number. There was no denying that laying his heart out on the line during his performances was what made him the star of Vocal Adrenaline.

Yes, Jesse did have a heart.

_**It just didn't belong to Rachel Barbara Berry, **_she realized.


	2. Get Along Without You When You're Gone

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, Jesse would have thrown eggs at Finn, instead.**

Thanks so much for your reviews, guys, and for adding my story to your favorites!

I hope you keep enjoying the story. I don't want to disappoint you all, but since I'm following the plot after the season finale, there will be Finchel in this chapter, and maybe a little longer.

But, I'm pleased to announce this chapter contains a bit of Wemma, though angsty. You'll also find Quinn in this chapter, along with a couple other fellow Glee members.

* * *

Rachel was applying her lip balm when she saw Finn walking towards her. Once he was close enough, he briefly bent down to give her a light kiss on the lips, and slouched to give her a hug.

Rachel reached up on her tip toes to wrap her arms around his neck. She tried to ignore the fact that she missed a different scent when she inhaled against his shoulder. Letting go of her, Finn kissed her on the cheek.

"You look beautiful," he said, looking down to appraise her blue blouse and whit skirt.

"Thank you," she responded, tugging at the bottom of her blouse.

"No animal sweaters today?"

Rachel looked up at Finn, grimacing.

"No," she said defensively.

Finn looked a little concerned, unclear about what he did wrong.

"Rachel, I didn't mean to make it sound like a joke…" he shrugged his shoulder lightly. "Well, okay, I did. But not at your expense. I didn't mean anything by it," he smiled softly at her. "I like your animal sweaters. I think they're…" he struggled for words. "Cute," he finished.

Rachel's stern face relaxed into a smile. She began to relax, and grasped his hand in hers.

"I know. I'm sorry," she apologized.

Finn brought up her hand to his mouth and kissed it.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Yes," Rachel nodded. "let's go before we're late."

He nodded and opened the door for her - like any gentleman would- and stepped inside before her.

* * *

Sitting in the music room, Rachel could see that Mr. Schue had something on his mind. After asking the students to think of a way to thank Ms. Sylvester for helping them keep their club, Mr. Schue had uncharacteristically let them out early from Glee.

"I think it's Ms. Pillsbury," Mercedes whispered to Kurt.

Rachel turned her head to see the all the two huddled together speculating over Mr. Schue's mood. Kurt gave Rachel a light smile, while Quinn faced the front of the room. Rachel couldn't help but follow her gaze, and she saw Mr. Schue sitting by the piano. He was taking his time collecting his things, as if he didn't want to leave yet.

"Why is he still here?" asked Quinn in a small voice. "Shouldn't he be leaving now? He said he had somewhere to be."

Rachel looked at her, and shrugged.

"I think he's hiding from Ms. Pillsbury," said Mercedes.

The group looked at her questioningly.

"I was in her office today," she started explaining. "I needed help getting out of a class. Anyway, I was in her office when the lady from the front office came in to give her a small bouquet of flowers delivered for her. She told Ms. Pillsbury that they were from her new boyfriend."

Mercedes face took a pitying look when she saw Mr. Schue.

"So, she received a gift from her new boyfriend, what does that have to do with Mr. Schue?" asked Kurt.

"Well, the lady told Ms. Pillsbury her new boyfriend is coming to pick her up today from work to go somewhere…" she gave air quotes, "special."

Kurt started to laugh quietly.

"That's not all. When she left, I saw Mr. Schue standing outside her door. He may or may not have heard."

The group then turned to look at their coach. He looked a little hesitant to stand up and leave. When his eyes found the huddled group staring back at him, the circle immediately started to disperse. While Mercedes walked out with Kurt, Rachel was left standing next to Quinn sympathizing with Mr. Schue.

The girls walked up to Mr. Schue, and when they reached him, he couldn't help but smile.

"Hi ladies. I guess Mercedes gave you the dirt, huh?"

"Look, Mr Schue, that's none of our business," stated Quinn.

Rachel took a second to take a good look at her coach. It was obvious that he was bothered by what he had heard.

"Mr. Schue, I know I'm way out of line to be saying this, but maybe it's time to move on," said Rachel.

"I am," he responded. "At least, I'm trying my best to."

"Well, try harder. None of us want to see you like this," said Rachel, "maybe you should think about, I don't know, dating other people," she shrugged.

Mr. Schue gave the girls an incredulous look.

"Look girls, this is incredibly uncomfortable to talk about with you, not to mention inappropriate."

"We just want to help," Quinn stated. "You have been there for me, for us. We don't like seeing you like this."

"Thank you, ladies. But, I can't date other people without moving on first. It's not fair for anyone if I start something new when I still have feelings for someone else."

Rachel turned her head to find Finn talking to Santana by the door. She sighed deeply, and turned back to Mr. Schue.

"I really appreciate you girls trying to look after me. I promise I won't let my personal life interfere with glee again," he said as he stood up to leave. "Now, I really must go."

Rachel and Quinn started to walk behind him.

Finn saw Rachel approaching and dismissed Santana. He walked up to them and said hi to Quinn, who just smiled and walked away, leaving the couple alone in the room.

"Ready to go?" he asked Rachel.

She nodded and leaned in to his form when he wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

* * *

"So I was wondering if we could meet at eight tonight, instead of seven," Finn told her. "I have to pick up my mom from a dentist appointment."

"Yes, that's fine," was her response.

The two walked out into the hallway with Finn's arm around her. Rachel's smile faltered when she failed to rest her head on his chest. There was something comforting in hearing someone else's heartbeat, especially when she was feeling concerned. But, Finn's heart lay inches above her ear.

As they approached the staircase, Rachel saw Quinn standing still in the hallway. She looked up at Finn pleadingly, and smiled. He looked at Quinn and realised what she was trying to say and took his arm off of Rachel.

"I'll meet you outside," he leaned in to kiss her gently on the cheek.

"Okay."

Quinn turned around to find Rachel when she heard her approaching footsteps.

"Look, it's the boyfriend," she told Rachel.

Rachel followed her gaze to find a dark-haired man inside Ms. Pillsbury's office.

"Well, he certainly is handsome. Good thing Mr. Schue left before he could see this."

Quinn smiled and nodded.

The man's smile was so wide as he entered to see his girlfriend. Ms. Pillsbury returned his smile, and the two embraced.

"Well, they look happy," voiced Rachel softly.

Quinn looked at her with a frown.

"Of course they _look _happy, but are they?" she asked Rachel exasperatedly.

Rachel just stared at Quinn. She couldn't think of a way to respond her.

"You know," Quinn started, "you may not be pregnant, but you're still lying to Finn."

"What are you talking about?"

"You don't love him," Quinn boldly declared. When Rachel didn't respond, she stomped away, leaving Rachel watching her as she did so.

The accusation still fresh, Rachel turned to look at the couple behind the glass window. She observed as the man kissed the guidance counselor on the cheek and stood up. With his back to her, Rachel saw Ms. Pillsbury's smile waver just a tiny bit before the man faced her again.

Rachel remained outside wondering if she looked just as unhappy with Finn as Ms. Pillsbury did.

* * *

No, I haven't forgotten about Jesse. His p.o.v. is coming up in the next chapter.

Review, please!


	3. Is Someone Loving You?

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, there would have been a Jesse shower scene to blow Finn's out of the water. **

Thanks once again for the reviews/additions to favorite lists and alerts. Please continue telling me what you liked, and what you didn't. It really is a motivator.

I would like to dedicate this chapter to my friend M () because she really wanted Jesse to sing a certain song, and I was more than happy to make her wish come true. At least in FanFiction.

Also, I know that Shelby said she was retiring, but in my story, she won't retire until _after _Nationals.

So, as promised, here's Jesse's P.O.V.

* * *

Jesse held the girl in front of him by the waist as she did a head roll.

_Take it to the chorus_

The team was running the number they were set to perform later that night. WOHN News 8 was doing a special on Carmel High's Glee club after their big win at Regionals.

The beat stopped, and the members of Vocal Adrenaline waited in position for their next instructions.

"Alright, that's it for today," called out Ms. Corcoran. "Make sure you get to the station on time, everybody."

Everyone in the auditorium went to gather their things to leave. It had been a tough rehearsal. In fact, it had been a tough week. The team was in the midst of deciding a number for Nationals, and they still had not been able to make a final choice. They'd done plenty of Queen numbers, trying to find the perfect song. Everything from _Don't Stop Me Now, _and even _We Will Rock You._ Still, nothing had resonated well with the team's soon to be retired coach or the co-captain.

Jesse was struggling to come up with a song that would surely lead Vocal Adrenaline to it's fourth consecutive National title, but his mind had been filled with thoughts of his ex-girlfriend. Being a professional, Jesse did well during rehearsals, often leading the team in numerous numbers. Lately though, his performer mind-set had stayed inside the auditorium exclusively.

Sliding his bag on his shoulder, Jesse could faintly hear his co-captain talking with Ms. Corcoran.

"I still think this is the wrong number for the interview…"

Jesse faced the pair, and walked towards them.

"What are you talking about, Giselle? This song suits the occasion," he almost yelled at her. "It's entertaining, and it showcases our talent perfectly. It's the best choice for tonight's news."

Ms. Corcoran turned to look at him, while Giselle ignored him and kept addressing their coach.

"Look, we only have a little above a minute for our performance…" she started.

"And I've arranged the number to fit under the time constraint," said Jesse.

But Giselle was still not acknowledging him. "I still think that my suggestion will be better for tonight. Besides, it already proved to be a crowd pleaser."

At this, Jesse's nostrils flared. Giselle went on seemingly unaware of Jesse's anger.

"It certainly delighted our last," she looked straight at him now, "audience."

Jesse marched his way to Giselle, only to have Shelby stop him.

"Look," started Ms. Corcoran, "it's not professional to have my two captains fighting. You used to be on each other's side before, and agreed on everything. You two need to work this out, okay? Whatever number you _both _decide on is fine with me. I'll see you both later tonight." She left the two captains alone, and walked out of the auditorium.

"She's right. We can't be fighting over this, Giselle."

She cocked an eyebrow at him. "Well, you know that I'm right about the song, Jesse."

Jesse sighed in frustration. "Aren't you tired of Queen already, though? I mean, how many numbers have we done this week alone?"

Giselle threw her hands in the air. "Well then pick one, already!" she exclaimed. "I've done my part with putting suggestions out there for Nationals, but you keep shooting them down."

"Because they don't feel right for the competition."

Giselle nodded, and stepped closer to Jesse. "Okay, fine. I understand. But you need to trust my instinct as well, and I really don't think this is the right number for the interview. I mean, it's Justin Timberlake on a news show, for goodness sake, it's not an awards show."

Jesse shook his head stubbornly, and stood determined. "We're doing that number, Giselle. That's the end of it."

He stalked off in the opposite direction, leaving his co-captain alone in the auditorium.

* * *

Ms. Corcoran was finishing her interview with the news anchor, while Jesse and his teammates were preparing onstage. His mind was buzzing with the replay of his interview only minutes before. He was stunned at the mention of Rachel Berry, and almost went catatonic on live television. Now, he only hoped he could get it together for the performance.

All the male performers had their backs to the camera, covering the girls' view, as well. They were silently waiting for their cue.

When Jesse felt Giselle's arms wrap around his waist, he knew something was wrong. He looked at her questioningly, and she just winked at him. He looked around to find that all the girls had their hands on the boys' waists.

"What's going on, Giselle? This is not how it starts."

She smiled at him before responding, "You're not the only captain here, Jesse. So don't pretend to be."

Jesse was about to speak, when he heard the anchor announce their performance.

Jesse was a professional. He was a performer. Above all else, he was a star.

And that is why, when the song failed to be _Sexy Back, _he put on his show face, and went along performing Vocal Adrenaline's rendition of _Another One Bites the Dust._

_

* * *

_

Sitting in his couch at home, Jesse was watching his interview that had been recorded from earlier. He unbuttoned the first three buttons of his red shirt, and leaned back to feel more comfortable. On the screen, he had the same shirt, with the customary black pants he wore for his performances.

"_So, tell me Jesse St. James, how does it feel to be on your way to Nationals for the fourth consecutive year?" asked the news anchor._

_Jesse shrugged lightly, and smiled at him. "Well, it's really exciting, of course. You know, I always knew that I'd be graduating with this title, and I couldn't be happier."_

"_Tell me, as the great performer that you are, you must dedicate your time solely for Vocal Adrenaline, huh?"_

"_Well, it is hard work, but it all pays off ."_

"_Has it ever been hard to give up something else in your life for show choir?"_

_Jesse looked down momentarily, "I'd say yes, but at the end of the day, I'm a performer. This is what I do, and I would never give it up for anything else in the world."_

"_Now, I heard that for a while you were part of a rival team, is this true?"_

_Jesse fumbled to answer. The question caught him off guard, which resulted in his show-face wavering for a bit. _

"_Yes, it's true. I was part of New Directions for a while, but then I came back to Vocal Adrenaline."_

"_Let me tell you, I was at the Regional competition, and for a while it seemed that New Directions could be a threat to your team. You know, the chemistry between the two lead singers was magnificent. And the female lead singer, Rachel Berry was incredible. She's really something, huh? Did you get a chance to see them perform?"_

"_No, I didn't. I was busy preparing for my own performance, actually. But I know that the group has a couple of special talents, but at the end of the day it just wasn't enough to beat us. Of course, there is always next year."_

As the screen played footage of Regionals, Jesse's mind went back to the day of the competition. He did in fact catch a glimpse of New Directions' performance. His team was next, so he was only able to see the beginning of it. His eyes were now glued to the television which was showing that performance of _Faithfully _he witnessed that day.

Then, the screen changed to display Shelby Corcoran answering questions.

"_Now is it true that you are retiring soon, Ms. Corcoran?" the anchor asked her._

"_Yes, it is true. I'm actually going to stay in New York after Nationals."_

"_What about next year, will there be a head to lead Vocal Adrenaline?"_

"_Yes, there will be. I can assure you that there will be a new head coach. I met with him briefly already, and I'm positive that he will do a great job with the team."_

Jesse pressed the rewind button on his remote to see Rachel's figure singing with Finn. Rachel Berry really was something. Their chemistry was undeniable, but surely it wasn't enough to break what they once had, was it?

He searched inside his pocket and brought out his phone. He needed to talk to her. As much as he wished she didn't see the interview, a part of him knew she had witnessed yet another _Another One Bites the Dust _routine. He flipped his phone open, and quickly searched for her number, pressing _send_ once he found it. His hands shaking slightly as he brought the phone to his ear.

After the third ring, he heard Rachel answer.

"Hello," she voiced hoarsely .

"Rachel, look," he replied gruffly, "I don't know whether you caught the news tonight, or not. But just in case you did, I wanted to apologize." He ran his hand through his hair desperately. "That was not planned. I had chosen another song to sing, but Giselle changed it at the last minute, and I just had to go along with it, you know? I mean, I couldn't stop in the middle of live television because-"

"-the show must go on, right?" she cut him off.

He sighed dejectedly. "Rach, can I please see you? I need to talk to you, explain things, apologize."

"Goodnight Jesse," she hung up.

* * *

Jesse arrived at the auditorium late for the first time in four years, and saw everybody staring down at him. He gave the coach an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry," he began. "I lost track of time."

"Really? May I ask where you were?" asked Ms. Corcoran.

Jesse didn't know how to reply. He didn't want to tell her that he had dropped by McKinley High hoping to see a certain petite brunette. He had seen said brunette, but she was walking with a much taller guy to the front of the school. When Jesse had seen their hands intertwined, he left right away.

He wanted to see her and explain his actions the best way he could. He wanted to apologize. But he realized that it probably wouldn't matter to her anymore.

"I went to the music store," he answered, instead. "I was looking for a great song choice for Nationals."

"And did you find any?" asked Ms. Corcoran.

"Not this time. But I'll keep looking," he answered his coach.

Jesse realized that he had to be more focused on the upcoming competition. It was his biggest dream, after all, to graduate with his fourth National title before leaving to California. The trip to New York was very near now and he needed to be at the top of his game, now more than ever.

Thinking back at his conversation with Rachel from the night before, he suddenly knew which song was the perfect choice for his team.

"The show must go on," he exclaimed.

"Yes, it must, Jesse. Now please, get ready for rehearsal," called out his coach.

"No. _The Show Must Go On_. For Nationals. It's the ideal song for the competition!" he exclaimed.

Shelby smiled at him, and he looked around to see that his teammates seemed to agree with him.

Yes, the show _must _go on, just like Rachel had said last night. He couldn't let the disillusionment of a lost love get in the way of his dreams.

Even if she starred in them every night.

* * *

Hope you guys liked this chapter.

And, if any of you are wondering, the song I chose for Nationals is by Queen.

I was having a hard time coming up with a good song selection, and then I thought that Queen is VA's Journey. So then, I went crazy listening to Queen's songs, and this one just made that right impression. If you've heard it, please let me know if you can see Jesse singing this song in Nationals, like I could. It was a gut feeling, and I hope it was a right move.

Reviews, like always, will be appreciated!


	4. No Escape From Reality

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, it would end with Jesse's 'Bohemian Rhapsody' every night.**

I can't thank you all enough for all the reviews and alerts! You have no idea how happy they make me.

Sorry for taking so long to update. It took me forever to finish this chapter, but I will go ahead and blame that on the fact that Finchel is not really that inspiring. At least for me. I also got sick in the process, and well, just didn't feel like writing.

There's a quick Puckleberry scene, but not nearly enough to take away from my OTP; or gross out some Puckleberry haters (here's looking at YOU, M! lol, ilu though). There's also a _hint _of Quick in this chapter, though not really concrete as the couple was not exactly official by the show's season finale.

Anyways, I'm not too proud of this chapter, but I hope that at least the ending will make up for it.

* * *

Rachel was looking out the side window, watching the glow of the night as the car sped along. In her mind, she went over the events of the previous night.

She was sitting on her couch with Finn, after they had just finished watching _Grease_, the only musical Finn would watch because it was the only one he was familiar with. She had gone to the kitchen to fetch them both something to drink, when she heard Jesse's voice from the living room.

She'd stopped in the middle of the room, and willed herself to turn around and see if it was truly him, or just one of the tricks her mind insisted on playing on her. When she saw his face on the screen, she almost sighed in relief to know that it was really him and she wasn't going crazy.

She refused to leave the safety of her kitchen and risk ogling at Jesse on the screen in front of Finn. No, it was better to just listen to him from the kitchen. Rachel faintly felt her body still at the mention of herself and New Directions. She had thought he would deny it, claim it as completely false and ridiculous. But he didn't and she couldn't help smiling when she realized that.

When she heard the interview switch to Shelby, she thought it was the best opportunity to come back to the living room, drinks in hand.

Upon hearing Shelby's news about moving, Finn saw Rachel's shocked and hurt expression. He had tried to talk to her and comfort her ever since, but never quite succeeded. He didn't know how much she had always longed to see her mother, he never fully understood. Finn's words were sweet and well-intended, but they never quite gave her the comfort she didn't ask for but still needed. His hugs never generated the right amount of solace when he held her. But she knew his actions were kind and that he meant well, which is why she didn't have the heart to reject his arms and turn for her comforter instead.

Later that night, after she'd convinced Finn that she was fine and he had left her in the comfort of her bed, she let herself cry over the loss of her mother all over again. She didn't stop until moments after she'd received a certain call.

Jesse thought her to be upset over the song Vocal Adrenaline had performed, but she didn't even remember the song they had chosen. After the initial shock that he had called her, Rachel felt her anger rise. Here she was, crying over the fact that she'd found her mother, and she was now moving away; and all he wanted to talk about was them. She just didn't want to get into that subject, not that he deserved a chance to talk. Rachel knew how vulnerable she was at the time, and how good talking to him about her mother had made her feel before; so she cut the call short before she agreed on his offer to meet up and talk. When she hung up on him, she'd finally relented to deleting his number, even if he hadn't deleted hers. Rachel didn't let herself think about that, and fell asleep feeling a little better after having heard his voice.

Now, she was sitting in the passenger seat, coming home from dinner with Finn. The date had been fine, but the occasional awkward silence never ceased to make an appearance. Finn usually tried to fill it. Rachel, however, sometimes preferred it. She should've felt guilty about that, but strangely enough, she didn't.

"Are you sure you're okay?" asked Finn. "I mean, I know how upset you were after the news show last night."

"I'm fine," she lied. "Really."

"Dinner was great, right?"

"Yes, it was," she smiled at him.

He guided his hand across the seat, and entwined his fingers in hers. He smiled widely, and sighed. "You know, I'm so glad we gave this another shot, Rachel. I'm so happy with you," he kissed her hand, "really happy."

His face was filled with so much bliss, Rachel didn't doubt his sentiment. She could tell from the way he looked at her and smiled at her. His kisses were so soft and feather-light on her skin, that they brought a smile to her face with how delicate he was with her. He was never in a bad mood around her, and was always the perfect gentleman. She knew he was really willing to make her happy with him once and for all.

Looking over at Finn driving next to her, Rachel tried to picture herself truly happy with him, but the image didn't appear.

* * *

"Why are you doing this?" Puck shouted.

"Why do you care?" Quinn asked back.

"Because, she kicked you off the team without a care in the world earlier this year. She was quick to replace you with Santana, and the Cheerios turned their back on you, Quinn. That's why" he answered her. "Why are you willing to go back to them after all that?"

Rachel tried to look away from the pair fighting in the hallway. She'd never seen Puck react that way before, especially at Quinn. She watched as Quinn shook her head and stomped her way inside the music room. Rachel slowly walked up to Puck, who was breathing heavily.

"Is everything okay?" she asked tentatively. "What's going on?"

"Ms. Sylvester is setting up a special diet and exercise plan for Quinn so she can come back to the Cheerios soon," he grunted. "Can you believe it, after what she did, she wants her head cheerleader back. And Quinn's willing to go back to her." He shook his head incredulously, and Rachel walked closer to him.

"Well, maybe she misses it. She was head cheerleader for a long time, Puck. You chose to quit football for Glee, but she wasn't given a choice in leaving the Cheerios team after she got pregnant."

"She just wants her status back, don't you see? She's tired of seeing Santana in the shoes she once filled."

"Santana might have taken over as head cheerleader, but I doubt she could ever fill Quinn's shoes, Puck. She's not that great of a cheerleader."

Puck just laughed at her statement, and nodded. They walked to the music room together.

"It's not just in cheerleading. Santana is taking over everything that was once Quinn's," he told her.

"Did she start with you?" she asked him sarcastically. His shy smile made her laugh.

"Maybe," he shrugged. "She got to Finn too, remember?"

Rachel looked up at him, and nodded. "Yeah, but nothing came of it. I mean, not that it did with you. But, it was nothing more than a triple date with her and Brittany."

He laughed, remembering his _own _date with the two cheerleaders. "I guess that his one night with Santana didn't turn into having him sleep with her again. I mean, I had enough with sharing you and Quinn already, you know." Rachel furrowed her brows. "I didn't mean it like that, Rachel. I know that we didn't, you know… I just mean that, the same three girls would have been really weird, that's all."

She shook her head, and brought an arm out to prevent him from entering the room. "Finn slept with Santana?" she asked.

He shrugged and said "Yeah, that's what she told me. She said it was only once, and it's not like we were dating. So I didn't really care. I thought you knew, you seemed to know about his date with her and Brittany…"

"Yeah, he told me about the date," she answered.

She let her arm down and he walked inside before her. As she made her way next to Finn, he slid an arm around her shoulder, and she looked at Santana. The girl was not looking at either of them, but Rachel still couldn't help the agitation she felt just by looking at her.

"Alright guys, Finn told me you have put together a new routine?" Mr. Schue asked the students.

Finn had convinced Rachel that they should try and come up with a new number to try to cheer the team up after Regionals. She wanted to look for a song that will prepare them for next Sectionals, so that in a year from now, New Directions would have something to celebrate. But Finn agreed with Mr. Schue, and thought it was too soon to start thinking about that. He chose a song that the team could relate to and help lift their spirits after their loss, but Rachel had a feeling that he chose the song for another reason. One that involved her.

The team got into position at the front of the room. Finn and Rachel were in the center, as always. The music started playing, and Rachel faced Finn as he started singing.

_Looking in your eyes, I see a paradise._

_This world that I found is too good to be true._

_Standing here beside you, I want so much to give you _

_this love in my heart that I'm feeling for you  
_

Rachel approached Finn as she began her part.

_Let them say we're crazy._

_I don't care about that._

_Put your hand in my hand, baby, don't ever look back._

_Let the world around us just fall apart._

_Maybe we can make it if we're heart to heart  
_

The couple faced the front of the room as the rest of the club members joined in.

_And we can build this thing together, stand in stone forever,_

_Nothing's gonna stop us now._

_And if this world runs out of lovers we'll still have each other._

_Nothing's gonna stop us, nothing's gonna stop us now._

Yes, there was no doubt Finn had chosen this song because of their relationship. While she appreciated the sentiment, she found it hard to return the feeling. Especially after what she had uncovered just minutes before.

* * *

Rachel was sitting in her bed, waiting for Finn to arrive. She had called him over because she needed to talk to him. She expected the news Puck gave her to upset her, have her running to the restroom and stay in there the whole time. But it didn't. Her heart didn't break when she looked at Finn, and she didn't feel like throwing accusations at him or asking for answers.

To put it simply, she just didn't care.

She stood up the moment Finn walked in to her bedroom, and she faced him. He smiled at her, but it soon faded into worry when she turned her head away from him when he tried to kiss her.

"What's wrong?" he asked her.

"I know about Santana, Finn," she announced. She watched his face fall as he realised what she was talking about. She could lie to herself and say that she wanted him to deny it, to tell her it wasn't true. But when she felt relieved he didn't, she knew what she had to do.

"You lied to me," she told him.

"Look Rachel, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have lied to you," he took both of her hands in his. "She meant nothing to me, okay? Please believe me," he begged.

She looked down at their hands, and she shook her head slowly. "We can't be together anymore, Finn."

"Don't do this" he pleaded. "I love you, Rachel, you have to believe me."

"But I don't want to be with you anymore," she cut him off. She looked up at him, square in the eyes, and prepared herself to tell him the truth. "I'm sorry, Finn, but I don't. And the sooner we end this, the better for both of us. I can't stay with you." She let go of his hands.

He swallowed hard, and looked away from her face. "Everything in the past, I'm so sorry about all that. Quinn, football, the thing about the scholarship, I never should have hurt you like that. I realized how wrong I was, and I changed, Rachel. I wanted to prove to you that I do love you."

"I know, and you did. But this thing with Santana made me realize what I've been trying to ignore this whole time, Finn. I can't keep lying to you or myself anymore."

"Look, I'm so sorry I lied to you about Santana. The truth is, I don't even know why I did. We weren't together at the time, and just seeing you with someone else made me crazy. And when you told me that you had…" he looked at her expectantly.

She quickly understood what he was trying to say. "I lied."

"What?"

"I didn't go through with it. I wasn't ready," she told him.

Finn gave her an incredulous look. "You lied?"

She nodded slowly. "Not a pleasant feeling, is it?"

He shook his head angrily, half smiling to himself. He wasn't sure if he should be angry at her for lying, or be relieved that she did. "You're mad at me for lying, when you lied to me too?"

"I know, I'm sorry. But that's just it, I'm not mad at you, Finn."

"Then why are you…"

"Because I don't love you, Finn. And it's not fair for either of us to stay in this relationship when I don't feel the same way you do."

There was a long pause. The tension between them was so thick, Rachel couldn't stand it. She wanted him to say something since she didn't know what to do next, but she was afraid of what he would say.

"Well, I guess that explains why you never said 'I love you' back," he shot back dryly.

"I couldn't Finn. No matter what other lies we may have told each other, I couldn't lie to you about that. I hope you understand."

Finn swallowed. "Did you ever love me, Rachel?" He stared directly at her, and she could feel how his gaze was silently probing for sincerity.

"I did. Before…"

"Before Jesse?" She looked down and that simple action gave him his response.

"I'm sorry, Finn," she whispered. "I'm really, really sorry."

He nodded slowly, and approached her. She jumped at the sudden grasp his hands had on her upper arms. When she tilted her head up, he surprised her with a kiss on top of her head.

"Me too," he told her, and walked out of her room and out of her life.

* * *

Well, it finally happened. They broke up. Does this mean that St. Berry have a clear shot now? We'll see...

By the way, expect the next chapter soon. The image of Jon tied to a tree has been most helpful tonight =D

Oh and before I forget, The song New Directions sang was "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now" by Starship; in case any of you didn't recognize it. It's an oldie, but a goodie.

Once again, please let me know what you thought of this chapter. Suggestions for upcoming chapters are most welcomed also.


	5. Are You Happy, Are You Satisfied?

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, I would have demanded a rerun for the POM episode. Damn straight. **

Once again, thanks to all of you for your reviews! And, for adding my story in alerts/favorites.

Okay, so apparently, Glee Wiki says that Giselle and Andrea Cohen are the same person. Actually, they took out Giselle. I always thought Andre was the kinda reddish/brown hair that sang with Jesse High to Hell and during Bohemian Rhapsody. But apparently, she has no name. But I had already written this, so screw you Glee Wiki.

* * *

The music started playing, and Jesse made his way to Andrea Cohen. He had selected the ballad for Nationals, and seething from what happened at the news show, Jesse asked Andrea to do second voice to his in the number. Giselle was mad, of course, but there was not much she could do since she brought it on herself. Besides, after Andrea had sung backup in _Highway to Hell, _Jesse was convinced that she was just as good as Giselle. Maybe even better.

The piano started, and Jesse grabbed Andrea's hand, the rest of the group following his lead. Andrea spun to him, only to be released, and the group of boys and girls separated themselves. Boys on left side, and the girls on the right.

_I don't know where I'm at_

_I'm standing at the back_

_And I'm tired of waiting_

_Waiting here in line, hoping that I'll find_

_What I've been chasing._

Andrea joined him to sing back up.

_I shot for the sky_

_I'm stuck on the ground_

_So why do I try, I know I'm gonna fall down_

_I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?_

_Never know why it's coming down, down, down_

The group spread up in pairs again, and began their intricate choreography.

_Not ready to let go_

_Cause then I'd never know_

_What I could be missing_

_But I'm missing way too much _

_So when do I give up what I've been wishing for_

_I shot for the sky I'm stuck on the ground_

_So why do I try, I know I'm gonna fall down_

_I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?_

_Never know why it's coming down, down, down_

_Can't find another way around_

_And I don't want to hear the sound, of losing what I never found._

_I shot for the sky _

_I'm stuck on the ground_

_So why do I try, I know I'm gonna fall down_

_I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?_

_I never know why it's coming down, down, down_

_I shot for the sky_

_I'm stuck on the ground_

_So why do I try, I know I'm gonna fall down_

_I thought I could fly so why did I drown?_

_Oh it's coming down, down, down _

The piano stopped, and Shelby started clapping.

"Great job guys! That's exactly the type of feeling we need for Nationals. This year I want to show them that Vocal Adrenaline are not just soulless performing robots." The group laughed at her statement, and she looked straight at Jesse. "With this number, there is no doubt that we will show that we have feeling too. Great selection Jesse, and you and Andrea performed it beautifully."

The team was getting their stuff ready, relieved that they didn't have to run the number another time. Nationals was at the end of the week, and Jesse was confident that they were ready.

"Before you all leave, I want to talk to you about something. After Nationals, I will not be coming back with you guys to Lima. I will be staying in New York with my daughter."

Jesse's shock was evident, and Shelby tried to ignore it. "What do you mean you're staying in New York? I thought you wouldn't leave until next year?" he asked his coach.

"I decided that the sooner I move, the better. I'll have all summer adjusting, and the moving truck has already sent most of my furniture anyway." She looked at everyone, with her glance at Jesse lasting the shortest. "I won't be coming with you on the bus. I will be driving on my own with my daughter, and will probably be stopping along the way. I've arranged for chaperones to accompany you on the drive there. And I will see you there a couple of days after you arrive."

Jesse couldn't believe what he was hearing. Sure he was going to college next year, but it seems like his coach was just aching to be rid of them. What would that mean for the ones staying at Carmel High? To Vocal Adrenaline? To Rachel?

He sighed, closing his eyes. Rachel will undoubtedly be devastated.

* * *

Jesse stared back at the trophy behind the glass. It was standing, tall and proud-evidence of his hard work and dedication. There was only one other person in the world who had worked just as hard, maybe even harder.

The door opened and Shelby walked into her office. She sighed in surprise when she realized that Jesse was sitting, waiting for her. She came around her desk, and took her seat.

"What can I do for you, Jesse? She asked, shuffling around the papers lying atop her desk.

"Does she know?" Shelby looked up to see Jesse staring at the picture frame of her and Beth.

"About Beth? Yes, she knows."

He nodded slowly, "I was talking about the move, actually."

Shelby gulped, and she shrugged lightly. "Well, I told her I was planning to retire, and live my life as a mom."

Jesse scoffed at her response and shook his head. "I can't believe you haven't told her" he said. "She deserves to know…especially after-"

"After you chose Vocal Adrenaline instead of her?" she bit back. "May I remind you, that I had nothing to do with that decision, st. James. I didn't force you to egg her, either. You did that of your own volition."

"After you interfered in her life, only to desert her again! I may have acted selfishly, and I can't blame my egging on my teammates. But I'm just a guy," he said. "She will get over me, eventually. She will forget about me and move on, and my actions will only help to do that sooner. Especially now that she's with Finn."

Shelby shook her head and laughed bitterly. "Is that what you think? You obviously don't know much about girls. Especially girls like Rachel. Jesse, what you did will scar her for the rest of her life probably."

"Maybe, but not as bad as a mom she's starved for her entire existence. She will move on from me, in fact, I'm fairly certain she already has. One day, she will find the guy she truly deserves that will make her happy, and make things from her past relationships seem meaningless. But she will never find another mother." Jesse stood up, and Shelby looked up at him. "You should tell her that you're moving away. You should try to have her back in your life, before it's too late. Even if there's not much that can come out of it, you should at least try. She deserves it."

* * *

Song Used:

_Down-_ Jason Walker

I hope you guys liked this chapter. The next onw is already written, and will be up shortly. I'm really excited for you to read the next one.

Reviews are lovely, as always!


	6. We'll Only Be Making It Right

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, I would have squeezed in a scene with Jesse's naked torso somewhere. Just Saying.**

Love getting your reviews everyone! Please keep them coming.

So excited for you all to read this chapter, so enjoy!

* * *

Rachel sat down in the booth of the little diner. She'd been surprised when she had been asked to come and even more surprised by whom.

She looked at her mother's unreadable expression. Shelby was sitting still, hands wrapped around her cup of coffee, and staring right back at Rachel.

Rachel thought she saw a hint of a smile forming on the woman's face, but Shelby quickly masked it, and looked down at her coffee. "Hi Rachel," she greeted when she finally looked up.

"Hi," Rachel greeted back. Her mouth curved into a smile that she wasn't afraid to show. "You said you wanted to talk?"

"Correct," Shelby nodded. "But first, would you like anything?"

"Just water would be fine," was Rachel's response.

Shelby asked the waitress for a glass of water, which was brought soon after.

Rachel thanked the waitress, and took a sip of her water.

"How's Beth?"

"She's good," Shelby smiled. "A handful sometimes, but good."

"Nice to know you're enjoying your daughter," Rachel told her. She didn't try to hide the resentment in her voice. It hurt to look at her mother as a stranger, but that was what she was.

"Look, Rachel. I asked you to meet me here so I can apologize," Shelby said, with her eyes down at her coffee. "I'm sorry I couldn't be a mother to you. I really am."

"Me too."

"I want you to know how proud I am. Seeing you onstage during Regionals was…" Shelby smiled at her. "I can't even begin to describe the feeling. It was better than when I saw you at Sectionals. Because this time, I could say 'that's my daughter up there,' and know for sure it was true."

Rachel swallowed back her tears, staring back at her mother. "Thank you," she said.

"I wanted to tell you that. I wanted you to know. I wish I could have done it right after I saw you. But then you asked me to come to New Directions, and…" Shelby seemed to struggle for words. She took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm glad I finally told you. You deserved to know that."

Rachel nodded and took a sip of her water, afraid her water was beginning to dry. Of course, she couldn't tell if she was thirsty, or just upset. That's always been a problem for her.

"There's something I want to tell you, Rachel. Something I want to apologize for."

Setting down her glass of water, Rachel faced Shelby.

"About Jesse."

Rachel stiffened. She didn't expect to talk about Jesse with Shelby. Not about the way he used her, and hurt her, anyway.

"I never should have requested Jesse's help in the matter. I'm so sorry you got hurt in the end."

"Look…" Rachel started. "Jesse was a mistake. But you didn't tell him to hurt me in the end. He did that on his own."

Shelby shook her head slowly, "Jesse cares about you Rachel."

"Well, he has a funny way of showing it."

"In fact, he's the one who convinced me to talk to you. He wanted me to get closer to you."

"I believe that's what he was supposed to do in the beginning, no?" Rachel asked bitterly.

Shelby looked down at her cup of coffee, clearly uncomfortable. "He told me you're with that Finn boy now," Shelby commented.

"I was. But not anymore," she said.

"Because of Jesse?" asked Shelby.

Now, it was Rachel's turn to look down at her drink.

"I wasn't happy with him," she told her mother.

Shelby could only nod.

* * *

Rachel was walking out of the diner, her head swirling with the conversation she had with her mother. After talking about Jesse and Finn, the pair got to talking about Beth, and her mother's plans to move. She was leaving in a couple of days, but promised to stay in touch. She even offered her to come by and visit when she wanted.

Rachel told her about her dreams of moving to New York in the future, and Shelby seemed to think her dream would definitely come true one day.

After the nice conversation she had with Shelby, Rachel scouldn't help feeling disappointed she was leaving soon.

It was hard imagining how her life would be next year. After Shelby and Jesse move away. After she messed things up with Finn.

She glanced up at the sky, and noticed it was about to rain. There was one place nearby that could shelter her from the drops, and she really needed to go there right now.

* * *

Rachel walked to the section of the music store where she was told she would find music sheets for Coldplay. She needed the perfect song to start the new year with New Directions. She didn't care what Mr. Schue had said, it was never too early to start preparing. Besides, focusing on music during the summer would help her get over the loss of Jesse, her mother moving away - and Finn.

After leafing through the music book, Rachel thought she could possibly find that perfect song she was looking for. Heading to the front of the store, Rachel stopped abruptly as she realized who was standing by the piano in the middle of the room.

As if sensing her presence, Jesse turned around to find Rachel standing a few feet away from him.

* * *

Okay...please review on this one. Otherwise, I'm not updating.

J/K, I would never do that to you all. Sorry it was kind of short, I think next one will be a short one too. It will be a little like the first, where I will show both p.o.v.'s

Until next time, friends...


	7. Want To Tell You So Much, I Love You

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, Jon would've had more songs during his run.**

Cannot thank you all enough for your reviews! Please, keep them coming...

* * *

Rachel smiled softly in acknowledgement of the stunned expression in his face, and started heading away, when she heard him say her name.

"Wait. Don't leave."

Rachel hesitated briefly, before turning to face him.

"Hello Jesse. I would like to say it's a nice surprise seeing you here, but that would be a lie." Her gaze went straight behind him, avoiding his eyes. Rachel was afraid of how she might react if she actually looked at him.

"Rachel, look.." Jesse started.

"I suppose I should congratulate you," Rachel stated. She sighed, and looked straight at him. "Congratulations on winning, Jesse. You really pulled a number on the audience."

Seeing Rachel's eyes again made Jesse turn momentarily numb inside. He didn't know what to say, but he couldn't stop staring at her. He'd missed her for so long, and having her in front of him after all this time was both heaven and hell.

"Rachel, I'm so sorry for everything…"

"Don't, Jesse. It's history now, let's just move on." Rachel turned away from him to head in the opposite direction.

"I loved you, Rachel."

She froze. Swallowing the pain she felt, and closing her eyes as they began to mist, Rachel took a deep breath.

"You've made that very clear, already Jesse. No need to bring it up again." Her voice sounded softer than she wanted.

Jesse reached for her hand, but stopped midway in the air.

"What I mean is, I did love you. I still do."

Rachel's pulse jolted, and she turned around to face him once again. She was surprised to see the sincere expression reflected on Jesse's face. Her throat went dry, and she couldn't speak, even if she knew what to say.

"But I know I've lost you."

Rachel could only blink. She tried to swallow the big lump in her throat, but it was getting bigger with each second she looked at him. She became immobilized in front of him. Unable to speak or move, she could only listen to what he had to say, while her nerves clawed at her from inside.

"I wish you the best with Finn."

He turned and walked away, leaving her standing breathless by the piano. She followed his figure as it walked out of the store, and out of her life again.

She placed the music sheet on the piano, and looked down on it. It was the same piano Jesse had played the first time they spoke. The memory of their first meeting rushed a surge of emotions in her. Feeling the sensation in her legs again, Rachel lurched forward and started heading out through the same door she saw Jesse leave.

Walking into the rain, Rachel looked in every direction to try and find Jesse. She didn't know what she would do or what she would say. All she knew is that she desperately wanted to catch him before he left.

But he was nowhere in sight. Rachel let out a sob, and closed her eyes. She felt the heat of the streak of moisture gliding down her face, but she blamed it on the rain.

* * *

Jesse's breaths came in long puffs as he gripped the steering wheel tightly until his knuckles turned white. He turned the air conditioner in his Range Rover to the highest power to try and relieve the pressure in his chest. His lungs expanded as he inhaled deep breaths of air. The wipers in his windshield clearing his view, he turned his car on and began to drive home. He turned the radio on to try and clear his mind, but it only made it worse as _Total Eclipse of the Heart _came on.

He should have felt like a huge burden had been lifted from his shoulders. Having finally been able to apologize, he was supposed to feel a lot better now. But the fact that he still didn't have Rachel by his side again made his heart ache and his lungs collapse. Perhaps he didn't deserve her, but he couldn't help feeling the pang of jealousy at the thought of her moving on with Finn.

It was selfish of him, but he wished Rachel had not turned to Finn so soon. He thought that what they had deserved at least more grieving time. It wasn't that he was still mad from the _Run Joey Run _incident. It would be lying if he said that it was professional envy he felt for Puck and Finn. Sure, sharing the spotlight has never been his cup of tea, but in his mindset at the time, it felt like more than a spotlight he was sharing. But she wasn't his to share anymore. She was with someone else now, and he had no one to blame but himself.

After parking in the driveway, he got out and made his way to the front of his house as the drops of rain fell like tiny crystals on the ground.

Marching straight to the washroom, he turned the water on and began to undress. Climbing inside his shower, he scrubbed his body as if he had his memories of Rachel attached to his skin, and was now trying to get rid of it.

After toweling the remaining droplets of water from his body, he stared at himself in the mirror. He was leaving for Nationals in two nights, and then he would leave Ohio for what he hoped would be for good. He began to wonder if he would regret leaving a certain girl behind in what would soon be his old life. He broke her heart, lead her closer to a mother who refused any further bond, and he was the reason her dreams of stardom didn't come true after Regionals. Something formed low in the pit of his stomach.

His dreams for the future came to mind. Winning Nationals for the fourth year in a row, moving out of Ohio to California, becoming a star of his own. Remembering the tears he saw marking Rachel's face, he recognized that knot in his stomach as dread, and he suddenly didn't know if it was all worth it.

* * *

Reviews would be lovely!


	8. Carry On

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, all of the St. Berry scenes that were cut would have been included in the DVD. Yes, I'm still raging about that..**

So, this took me a while longer to write than I wanted it to, but I'm glad it finally did. School started and with work full time, I've been a little exhausted these past couple of weeks. Anyway, I'm so close to finishing, so I'm pretty sad/excited about that. Also, I wanted to finish before the second season started, but at this point, I can't make any promises. I have to see how school and work treat me haha. But there's only a couple of chapters left...

Anyway, hope you all keep enjoying this!

* * *

The kids of New Directions were making their way out of the music room. Rachel grabbed her backpack and strolled in time to catch up to Puck. She tentatively touched his shoulder and he turned around to face her.

"Hi Noah. I was wondering if you had a few minutes. There's something I want to give you," she told him.

He nodded and they made their way to the desks on the side of the room.

"What's up? Is Finn boring you already?" He smirked at her.

"We're not together anymore," she whispered.

He looked down suddenly. "Listen Rachel, if it's because of what I told you, I really am sorry. I didn't tell you so you can break up with him."

She shook her head. "No, I know that. I just couldn't be with him anymore."

Puck turned his head toward the door, facing the direction Quinn had just walked out of. "I get it. It's that Jesse kid, right?"

Rachel swallowed and looked down. "Maybe."

He looked at her and nodded slowly. "Well, so you two are back together now?"

"No. I may still have feelings for him, but hurt is still one of them. I can't forgive him after what happened, yet. But that's not what I wanted to talk to you about," she said.

Rachel opened her bag and began digging in search of something. She brought out a small wrapped rectangle and put her bag down. She handed it to Puck, who took it.

"It's not my birthday, but thanks.'

She smiled. "I know it's not your birthday. I, um, met with my mom yesterday. She told me she's planning on moving to New York with Beth." Puck whipped his head to her in shock. "I wasn't sure if you already knew, but Vocal Adrenaline is leaving for Nationals tomorrow night, and she plans on not coming back." She saw Puck swallow and grip the present tightly. "I know it's not any consolation for your daughter being away, but I thought you'd like this."

He looked at her questioningly, and she gestured to the gift. Puck began unwrapping it, revealing a pink picture frame. The picture was of a cute baby in a pink onesie.

"Thanks," he whispered.

"I didn't know if you had any pictures of Beth, but I thought you should have one," she smiled.

* * *

Rachel was walking out of the music room when she saw Quinn coming out of the nearest ladies' room and she started running after her.

"Quinn, hold on a sec."

Quinn whipped around to face her, and stopped as she waited for Rachel to catch up to her. "What is it, Berry?"

"I just wanted to give you something." She walked closer to her. "I just told Puck that my mom is moving away to New York. She's taking Beth with her," she said.

Quinn flinched slightly, but kept a stony face. "Oh, well thanks for letting me know." She turned around quickly and Rachel tried to stop her.

"Wait, Quinn. Look it's not my place to interfere in your personal life and the decisions you make," Quinn looked at her. "I had a picture of Beth framed and I gave it to Puck for him keep."

"Well, how nice of you," quipped the blonde.

"I wanted to give you this." Rachel reached in her pocket and brought out a necklace. She handed it to Quinn, who brought it close to her face and realized it was a gold locket. "Open it," Rachel told her.

Quinn opened the locket and saw the same picture of Beth from Puck's frame inside. It was smaller, and Beth's face practically took the whole space of the oval shaped locket.

"Beautiful," she murmured so low, Rachel wasn't sure she heard her right.

"I thought you might want something to remind you of Beth also."

Quinn looked at Rachel, and she smiled fondly at the petite brunette. "Thank you, Rachel." Rachel nodded, and started to walk in the opposite direction. "I'm sorry about what I said the other day."

Rachel turned around to face Quinn once again. "About Finn and I?"

"Yes. It wasn't my place to interfere either, and I shouldn't judge on the decisions you make."

"I broke up with him," said Rachel.

Quinn blinked back in surprise. "I'm sorry," she said again.

"Don't be. You were right. I didn't love him." Quinn nodded slowly and she looked down at her locket. "Thanks for the locket. I love it."

Rachel smiled widely and told her, "So you can keep Beth close to your heart." She turned around and started walking away.

"Who do you keep close to yours?" Quinn called to her. Rachel stopped abruptly and faced Quinn. "If it's not Finn, then who is it?"

Rachel shook her head slightly. "That doesn't matter anymore."

"He might regret it, you know?"

"Yeah, I hope he does."

* * *

About to walk out of school, Rachel saw Mr. Schue approach her before she got to the exit doors.

"Hey Rachel, I'm glad I caught you before you left. Do you mind coming into my office? There's something I want to talk to you about," Mr. Schue said.

She nodded and followed him back to his office. Taking a seat, she waited impatiently for Mr. Schue to face her. "What is it, Mr. Schue?"

"Well, I just spoke to Shelby Corcoran over the phone. I need to give her the money Finn and Puck owe her for slashing Vocal Adrenaline's tires. She said I could just give you the money, and you would hand it to her?"

"Yes, you can. I'm actually going to see her tomorrow, say goodbye before she moves."

Mr. Schue looked a little confused. "Oh. So are you spending time with your mother?"

She shrugged. "A little. You know, as much as we can before she leaves for New York. Why do you ask?"

"Well, I was just a little surprised, that's all. Last time we talked about Jesse and your mom, you expressed some deep frustrations and hurt with the subject. I take it everything is okay now?"

Rachel looked away. Sure, she was talking more with her mom, but it still hurt to have her leave so soon. Seeing her with Beth may have made it a little worse than it already was. "Well, I don't know. I'm glad that she wants to spend time with me before she leaves. I'm just afraid that once she's gone, I'll feel even more depressed _because _of the time we did spend together."

Mr. Schue nodded in acknowledgement. "What about Jesse, have you talked to him at all?"

Rachel blinked, and before she could stop herself, she answered truthfully. "I saw him a couple of days ago at the book store."

"Oh, really?" He raised his eyebrows at her. "What happened?"

"Nothing really. He just apologized for what happened right before Regionals."

"Did you forgive him?"

She gulped. "I didn't. He left before I could find my voice to respond. To be honest, I don't know what I would have said to him."

"Well, at least he apologized right? I know it may not amount to much, but it speaks volumes of his character that he admitted what he did wrong and apologized for it. Don't you think?"

Rachel shook her head slowly. Sure he apologized, but was it enough? "There's something else." Mr. Schue looked at her expectantly. "He told me he still loves me," she breathed.

"Do you believe him?"

"No. I don't know. I don't want to. I mean, how can I believe anything that comes from him after all his lies?"

Mr. Schue smiled lightly. "Do you still love him?"

"Yes, I do. But, I still can't forget what he did. Even if I could believe him, it's still not enough to move on like nothing happened."

"Look Rachel, I know you were hurt. But I honestly believed that Jesse's feelings for you were true. He made a mistake, true. But he's shown you that he regrets it. And, to be honest, perhaps the best way to get over this will be to forgive him. You can't move on from this until you face it head on, and then go from there."

Rachel was shaking her head at her coach. "He's not like you, Mr. Schue. You may have made a mistake with Ms. Pillsbury, but you beat yourself up for it everyday. Jesse is off to win another trophy, and leaving this town and me behind. He doesn't need my forgiveness. You deserve to win Ms. Pillsbury back, you really love her."

"How do you know that Jesse is not feeling the same way after hurting you, Rachel? How do you know that he doesn't feel any regret of how he left things with you, and wish he could change his decision? You can't know anything for sure until you talk to him again. Even if it is just to forgive and forget, say goodbye and never look back. At least then you'll know for sure what his feelings were. Think about it Rachel. It's not too late to have a second chance at love."

Rachel walked out with Mr. Schue's words still swirling in her mind. Was he right?

* * *

Reviews are always incredibly sweet and make my day!


	9. Leave You All Behind And Face The Truth

This is my first time dipping into fanfiction...so reviews/suggestions would be appreciated to the fullest!

Many thanks to my wonderful beta, the lovely Soo.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. If I did, there would be no deleted St. Berry scenes at all.**

First of all, thanks again for all your reviews/alerts/favorites. I'm sorry I haven't replied as much, but in hopes to redeem myself for that, I have updated _much_ sooner than I ever have!

Enjoy!

* * *

The sunlight crept its way into Jesse's bedroom, and he groaned as it hit his eyes. He pulled the covers off and climbed out of bed. After putting on his clothes, he made his way down the stairs to the kitchen to eat breakfast. His parents were already sitting down at the table. Eating breakfast before they left for London. They had just gotten back from Bali in time for Regionals, and now they were planning another trip.

"Good morning," chirped his mother. His father only folded his newspaper as acknowledgment to his son.

"Good morning, mom. You guys need me to drive you to the airport?"

"No," said his father. "Your uncle will drive us, you have to go to school of course. You drive back to your uncle's house when it's done, alright?"

"Sure thing. So I'll see you guys at graduation?" Jesse asked.

"Actually, we were thinking that maybe you'd like to join us in London for the summer. You know, spend your last summer before college as a family. What do you say?"

Perhaps getting away would be the best thing for him to try and forget Rachel. "Sounds good, I guess. How about I think about it before you buy the tickets. I did want to spend some time with my friends before I left for college, you know?"

"Sure, Jesse. You let us know."

* * *

Vocal Adrenaline had finished their last rehearsal before leaving to New York. Jesse was looking around the stage, and thinking about the last four years. He definitely had some good times in high school and with Vocal Adrenaline. His teammates were not always his best friends, but they were friends. His coach had a drive that Jesse only saw in himself until he met her.

"Alright everybody. Remember to meet at five to get on the bus and we can leave on time to New York. I've arranged so that your new coach for next year will meet us after Nationals, and maybe he can drive back with you all."

Jesse and his teammates nodded and left the auditorium. He looked back at the stage from the front door. All of his performances have prepared him for the future he has always wanted. In just a couple of months, he will be in California. It seemed that he was inching closer to reach his greatest dream. He finished high school with a bang, and his future seemed so bright. But as he walked out of the auditorium, he couldn't help the sorrow he felt.

* * *

Jesse was walking toward his team standing by the bus. He was about to join them when he heard Ms. Corcoran call him. Turning around, he smiled warmly at her.

"So, are you ready?" she asked.

"Yes," he said, unconvincingly.

"I wanted to tell you that you were right. I shouldn't have just left without talking to Rachel again first. So I met with her."

Jesse smiled widely. "That's great," he said. Remembering his own encounter with her a couple of days ago, he wondered if her meeting with her mother had gone better. "So, what did you tell her?"

"Nothing you need to worry about," she smiled.

"I saw her too," he said. "I was at the music store and she was there also. We didn't talk much, but I apologized and wished her the best with Finn." He shrugged and added, "I guess it was an opportunity to say goodbye and not leave things as unsettled."

"Oh.," Ms. Corcoran raised her eyebrow. "What did she tell you?"

"Well, in the beginning she was clearly uncomfortable. And I left right after I apologized so she wouldn't have thrown her newfound happiness with Finn in my face."

"Wait, you left before she responded?" Shelby furrowed her eyebrows. "So she didn't get to tell you that she's not with Finn anymore?"

Jesse merely blinked. "She's not with Finn anymore?"

"No Jesse, she's not."

Shelby walked away leaving a baffled Jesse in front of the bus. Slowly, he made his way with the rest of his team. Shelby got in front of the group and faced them.

"Okay everybody, so we don't have to talk about the rules for the trip, do we?" The team laughed a little and some murmured no. "Well, what I do need to tell you is that coaching this team has been such a joy for me. You guys have made me so proud, and have reminded me of my own dream when I was your age," she glanced at Jesse briefly. "I wish for all of your dreams to come true. I'm not talking just about winning Nationals, although you do need to do that." The team laughed with her at her comment.

"But when I was younger, I thought I had a sense of what my dreams were. And I did everything possible to make them happen. You all have been a part of that, and I can't thank you enough. But now it's time I followed the dream I thought I'd let slip away a long time ago. And I want to ask you guys to not lose sight of what is truly important in your lives." She blinked back tears and smiled at her team.

"I want you all to look back at your Vocal Adrenaline time without a single regret. While it may seem for some of you seniors that this is the end of something special in your lives; the truth is, now is only the beginning to the rest of it."

Jesse listened intently to her words. He knew, probably more than most, how many regrets Shelby had. Sure, she may have failed to attain her dream of being a big star, but she did make a big name for herself. All those titles and recognition, only to have her quit all of it for another washed up dream.

He remembered the night of Regionals, how his team chanted his name and he knelt on the floor after being announced the winners. Sure, at the time, he was ecstatic. Picking up that trophy in the air was a moment full of the most pride and joy he'd ever felt. But, when the lights were off, and everyone was gone, all that was left was Jesse in his bed with his mind swirling with images he'd never had before.

He could go off and win another Nationals. Leave for college and lead a successful career. But that will only satisfy him temporarily. There will come a time when he would long for more than his career, and he might end up in a dead end, much like the one his coach found herself in. He could try and gain back what he lost before, but just like Shelby, he might be too late to try and win Rachel back.

If he was honest to himself, he would have to admit that the things he's worked so hard for most of his life, was suddenly not enough. He wanted, needed something else that he didn't have before. He needed someone else.

* * *

As Vocal Adrenaline were climbing inside the bus, Jesse knew he couldn't go with them. He turned around to walk away.

"Hey, where are you going St. James?" yelled Giselle.

Jesse turned to face his team. "I'm sorry, guys. But I can't go to Nationals with you."

"What? What do you mean you can't come to Nationals? We're a team, Jesse. You can't quit on us."

Jesse scoffed. "No, we're not a team anymore. Look, the past four years with you guys have been a blast. But, we all know this is the end of our road as teammates. Most of us will move on, and lead on new paths. You guys don't need me to win Nationals, you're all very talented in your own right."

"I can't believe you're doing this, Jesse. What is wrong with you?" Andrea asked him, enraged.

"My heart is just not in it anymore. I have to follow it back to where I left it."

Shelby was by the door of the bus, but she had heard everything, and as Jesse looked at her, she mouthed a single word to him.

Jesse could easily understand what she said to him.

_Go._

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Review, please?


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